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Sunday 20 April 2008

What is the meaning behind true success?

Fresh out of a screening of Romy and Michelle’s High School Reunion (in my loungeroom) has got me thinking about something that has plagued my mind for the past 5 years – ever since I left high school. I was always the unlucky one at school, I got teased for my foreign last name, wasn’t exactly the dux of the school and had one too many a-hole guys make my life in high school something that I would rather not remember.

I finished my High School Certificate (HSC), got my UAI – which I was planning on taking to uni to do a communications degree with – although it had other plans for moi: a grand total of 33.4% left me in a bit of a rut. I called my friends at the place I had spent my last 3 school holidays: Girlfriend Magazine and within 48 hours I had my dream job at my fingertips. No longer was I the ‘nobody chick’ who had the non-reciprocal crushes on the cutest boys in primary school or the girl who lusted after being in the popular group. I was me and being myself is what got me the most amazing first job anyone could ever think of. I had it all: The Job which of course equalled Success. I can even recall the day I got my first set of business cards, complete with my mobile telephone number on them. I went out to my usual Thursday night hang (Northern Beaches A.A) and handed them out like it was going out of fashion. By the end of the night one of my friends came running up to me screaming, “Bella, I was just dancing on the d-floor and could feel something under my foot, I picked it up and there was your business card stuck to the bottom of my shoe.” I couldn’t have wished for more. I was in my element. Until I started to take my 'success’ for granted. Those Thursday night pub trips became a habit that were far too familiar. Getting home at the crack of dawn was a normal part of my life, which left Fridays not exactly at most productive. Little did I know that what I was doing was actually not that normal at all and putting my job in major jeopardy. After being close to losing one of most amazing experiences of my life, I was given an ultimatum. Pull up your socks, focus on the job you have or move over, after all a million girls would kill for your job. It was the slap in the face I needed and I got out of my toxic habits and back into a routine where I could perform at my absolute best.

I bet those of you who knew about my first job are very surprised: the glitz and glamour of having an amazing job is not as easy as it seems. Lesson One: Success is not about what you’re doing, it’s about how you’re doing it.

I could name you about 10 women who have shaped the meaning of success for me over the past 5 years. Out of those 10 I'll share 3 with you.
Number One: My Mum. There you go thinking ahead of yourself again – no my mum and I have not always had the most perfect relationship, infact there are times in my teenage/adolescent years where I think she could have killed me (figuratively speaking). I haven’t exactly been an angel all my life and have put my mum through some tough times, not to mention everything she has experienced herself. Without going into it into detail I can tell you that I have never seen such determination. My mum has single handedly started up her own business and still has time to be a mum to me, my brother and my sister. Did I mention that 6 months ago she had severe Chronic Fatigue and could not even get out of bed? Now that's what I call success. Or my best friend, we’ll call her Phoebe (he he), made me realise something quite spectacular just the other night; for the past 5 years I have been trying to work my way up the magazine ladder, my dream is to one day be a beauty writer/editor for a magazine in Sydney/New York/London. The past 18 months of my life have revolved around this dream. Phoebe explained to me her move in the next 2 years – having just given handed over the reigns of Junior Fashion Ed at Girlfriend Magazine this girl was at the peak of her career, although that was her dream, now her dream is to travel the world, explore new places and people and enjoy life. She doesn’t care what job she has as long as she’s earning enough money to have fun. Another amazing success story.

And, how about the many women who I have been given the privilege to work with over the past 5 years – how they’ve followed their dreams and how success has shown up on their doorstep. My ex-boss, Miss Sarah Oakes – now ex-Girlfriender who had a dream to make Girlfriend Magazine Number One (Dolly has always been Number One according to logistics) in the space of 3 years she took a magazine that many girls glanced at to making every teen who reads Dolly pick up Girlfriend instead and become as passionate as she is about it. Now only 450 copies are separating the two mags. Talk about close! Now current Editor of Cleo Magazine, future Editor-in-Chief of every woman’s magazine possible (OK maybe not gospel yet but anything is possible).

Do you smell success? Coz I certainly do. All the things these women have in common?
They have followed their dreams.

They have helped me understand my dreams and even if I don't have them right now that's OK. What would a dream be if it was all wrapped up and given to you straight away anyways? What's important is that I have dreams. Even if I turn up to my 10 year high school reunion working at McDonalds. As long as I stay true to my dreams, I am successful. Like so many of the women I look up to.
You know who you are.

Peace Out,

Girl Next Door xoxo

4 comments:

frangipani princess said...

That was awesome! You've had a very interesting life, and I hope you keep going ab-fably!!

gg xx

Liv said...

Aw what a great post! I have missed your blogging and now here you are back with a truly inspiring piece.
I have been really depressed recently, struggling with the pressures of doing my VCE, a part-time job, trying to fit in an actual life, and constantly getting pressured by adults with that old chestnut: "what do you want to do when you leave school?"
The thing is, I always knew the answer to that (become a veterinarian) but lately my motivation and desire to achieve that goal has been shifting. Is this what I really want?
Your post today has reassured me that I don't have to have all the answers now, and unlike the careers teachers at school say, I CAN change my mind and pursue other goals, goals that haven't even entered my head yet, later down the track.

Thank you.

-Liv xoxo

Bella said...

Thanks so much Georgie and Liv! Nice to know that you girls are still regular visitors. Liv, I LOVE that I reasuured you and made a difference to your thinking and feeling good about yourself! That's what I aim to do. Please keep in touch. Bella xox

julialow said...

hi bella! :)
i was browsing sites and i found yours. i'm a glossy addict who aspires to be a magazine editor one day - and i'm chasing after that dream! currently doing a twinning programme, and will prolly end up in aussie to major in journalism in about 2 years' time.

how cool is it that you scored your first job at GF? sigh, that's like a dream come true for me. :)

hope to get to know you better through your blog. i know can learn a lot from you!

xx jules